wat i wana tell u !

maybe i'm really not understand u well..
if u ask me one of ur question, i'm sure i duno the answer..
haihz... very shame of it !
ok, how i noe i'm not noe u well ?
first, i duno wat u thinking of.
second, i duno how am i in ur heart.
third, i duno wat u like. for example : colour, drink, food, or watever things..
fourth, i duno how was a person u are..
and so on so on... now only i realize tat i'm not noe u well..
reali reali reali shame on it..


i noe u since im form one, well, i'm reali not very clear wat was happen when we are in form..
the oni thing i wont forget forever is we get along when we go penang..
i'm reali duno ur attendance is not good in form one..
i duno u are feel bad when i'm alone in pmo..
i duno u are asking me whether going to pmo is because of u duwan alone..
i duno u are feel scared in front of teacher..
of course not oni u will feel scared in front of teacher..
me too ~ until now oso will scared..
but, everytime i tell myself : die jiu die larh..
no nid scared de larh.. haha xD



sometime i will think : is it we are best fren ?
cos i reali not understand u well..
im reali feel very bad when i noe tat i hurt u when in form 3..
when i was good with fish.. somehow, i forget u tat time..
wat thing before i do i'll oso think for fish first..
no matter when, where.. oso i'll think for her..
remember everytime when relief or teacher having meeting..
i'll oso go her class find her.. and tat time i remember fish is good with lumei..
and i'll feel like is it spoiled their frenship ?
however, i din care about lumei's feeling..
keep on fren with fish.. and yet now become like tat..
recall back wat was happen last year..
remember after pmr we have ''program selepas pmr'' ?
our class going to beryl's chocolate factory..
because of our class not enough ppl.. so have to invite other class see them wana go with us anot..
cos tat time i very good with weilshern.. so i noe this..
so i ask pn lim whether can invite my fren anot..
i duno why the first person come out in mind is fish..
and i go lab find her and ask her wana go together anot..
second, i think of u.. so immediately go to ur classroom find u and ask u..
but, u are going with ur others fren so din go with me..
after pmr.. finally after pmr..
remember wat was happen to orange ?
tat time jo ye and shu yi oso there..
i noe tat time fish started to bushuang me d.. cos of orange..
so we become like tat...



miss last year concert.. reali miss it !
a very meaningful memories to me..
because of yongsiang.. thanks him ;)
although some memories is good, but still will have bad memories..
after concert, mean the ajk list came out..
fish began to become a leader, mean she have a post..
but, i dun have.. that time i'm reali very down.. moody..
luckily got weileng pei me when u all are having meeting..
i duno is it because of she got a post so slowly din choi me d..
duno ? but, i just got a feeling..
recall back pn lim's house..
a sad memories gua.. because of tat stupid orange..
suddenly sat in front of the gate and cried..
but oso have good memories cos of yongsiang..


time past very fast..



one month..

two month...


three month....



wooo...going to china trip luu..can be said both memories oso have there..
luckily u said u wana same room with me tat time..
if not, cham lor.....haha..
china, forever cannot forget de trip..
reali, good or bad oso have..
u noe de larh, wat was happen there...
ben lai i wan same room with fish de..
then u ask me first, but i duno how to reject ppl.
so i promise u lorh.. haha..
after that fish got come ask me wana same room with her anot..
then i already same room with u so she have to same room with sarah..
reali sad de lorh.. a happy trip will become like tat..
but, still cant forget it !



ok, pmo camp turn..
well, i'm reali very bad mood the whole camp until the drama..
form one, two and three fella reali give me a big surprise..
i din ever noe they will do so good in the drama and make me laugh..
wink ;) however, it can be oni last for a while,, can be said 10 min , 20 min ?
erm, about u, fish and lumei that case..
i'm reali fuii to u all.. and sad too..
i noe u are very good person, but too '' dan1 chun2'' d..
the moment i noe u all wan go shou ye, i have already noe is fish wana go see orange..
oni lumei is helping her.. so i said duwan go..
but, u all still duwan listen, then i ma dun care lorh..
let u all go lorh.. and we are same batch too.
if i scolded u all, then u all will think like : who are u o ?
haihz, then the whole camp was just like ...........................



maybe for u, u will feel like fish was a nothing to u since she same class to u, talk to u,
but, wat was happen u duno?
how was a person she is u duno ?
she is not a easy person.. wat she is thinking we duno..
just like wat was weileng told me..
she said fish is nothing... but for me..............
oni me and her noe larh..
and something u all are duno.. somebody told me how was her..
oni i noe..



er.. friday tat day when i noe tat u go mv with fish..
i'm reali got bit angry and bushuang..
ben lai tat day i tot she is going with orange..
but, i reali cant guess u are going out with her..
until yilynn told me..



p/s: im still not sure my feeling to him..



sometimes i reali got many things wana tell u..
but i duno why i will feel very difficult to open my mouth to tell u..
i will scared how u think of me..
for example : orange..
i duno wat do u think about me..
i'm scared !
i admit that i wont tell anyone my secret because of i scared !
duno why, maybe when grow up bigger.. will starting to tell out my thinking..
my feeling,
the person i tell my secret to is weileng..
then is ying, after tat is u..
follow by jo lee and sin wei ( my class )
sometime in class i'll tell huey a little bit..
i din tell my secret to anyone before.. until came to form 4 life.
reali.....



i dun like to cry in front of my frens..
not because of i duwan let them see my weak side..
is because of i will feel very '' fish ''
haha.. so din cry before..
the first person who see me cry before is u..
then in the phone is orange..
sometime when i talk on phone, i will cry oso oni them duno..
one of the reason i dun like to cry in front of ppl is
because i duwan let ppl feel like i cry purposely to make ppl feel sad for me..
i dun nid it ! do like this oni will let ppl feel u very weak, very jia !




a life tat full of hatred. sadness. emo.



hate this kind of life..
where is the happy pooiling gone ?
last time de pooiling, where are u ?
come back !

ling ;(